Now—as far as practical jokes go—it has been awhile since I’ve the player or the played. I just haven’t had many opportunities to make those happen. But I will tell you about two—rather funny—practical jokes—one I was the player the other one I was played.
The Player: Many moons ago I worked in a retail’s store back stock room. I was second fiddle to a guy named Cory who to say the least was an interesting guy. He and I worked great together—I guess that was a good thing considering he was banging our boss and if the company found out well—they both would have been jobless. (Yes a big no-no back in the day). But that didn’t mean I didn’t have my moments with him…he he he he.
So Cory was a blond-haired freckled kid—and always enjoyed a good laugh. As I said we worked well together and our end of the stock room was in tip top shape. There was one drawback to working with Cory. He dipped tobacco and always had a spit cup laying around. The company frowned on these spit cups—because they were nasty and in my opinion unsanitary—especially if one spilled over. Anyway, I hated looking at those nasty things and I had devised a brilliant plan to get him back. You see, Cory wasn’t afraid of much, but he was afraid of one thing and I happened to know what that one thing was
He went on lunch break and I took out my box cutter and dived into the Halloween merchandise. It was August. He would be gone an hour so I searched and searched til I found it. The prettiest 8 legged plastic creature in the box. This one was special—because it was made to look real. Now I knew the retail company wasn’t going to miss this little creature—in the least and I set my plan into motion. Ever so carefully, I placed that beauty down in that cup. (I snicker as I write this!!)
It took awhile for him to open up his chew. We were nearly had our tasks completed in the stock room for the day when he stuck the wad of nasty into his mouth. Oh it wasn’t long before he reached for that cup. I tried so damn hard to keep a straight face…gawd I really did. *snickers*
Well…he and I were chatting away and he goes to spit. Looking down for a second and then—flinging the cup across the stock room and jumping straight up in the air like a cat that had been electrocuted. His hole body turned beat red and he could not blink. He was also hyperventilating into a mass of hysteria. He couldn’t talk—although he kept trying while pointing frantically at the cup and with the critter inside!
Of course, I wanted to keep a straight face—but I couldn’t. I laughed so hard I about peed my pants. That little plastic spider almost literally scared him to death. I wasn’t the only one laughing about 3 other people witnessed the event and 1 of them knew my devious plan. HA! But I have to say to some degree it worked, because he never left another dip cup around where I could
see it and have the opportunity to play another joke on him.
The Played: I’ve blogged this one before on Myspace, but never saved it before deleting my account so it deserves to be retold.
My friends had a party planned for my 22nd birthday. It wasn’t a surprise party—and I was excited because we all took the night off including my boyfriend. Unfortunately, the night before we were to go out and celebrate my birthday, my boyfriend calls me from the military base and says he has orders to fly out, he’s very sorry, he’d make it up to me. I was a bit bummed—but okay—such is the life of a military man.
I called my friend Laurie, who had born the whole birthday bash plan and told her, no big deal she tells me, it will be a girls night out. The next night my friends take me roller skating. It was so much fun!! I had not been since my high school days and I had really missed how much fun it could be. We had a blast skating, listening to music from the 80’s and playing all the games like the hokey pokey, the chicken dance and the limbo.
After they surprised me and told me that they were taking me to a late dinner. I was so happy because I was quite hungry after skating my butt off. The problem was they took me to a rather upscale restaurant. Normally, I wouldn’t mind, but I had just got done skating and here I was all hot and sweaty! Oh well—I figure they are all hot and sticky too—so it will be a big group of us hot and sticky girls.
We drove to the restaurant on some pretty icy roads. We made our way inside and Laurie talks to the host greeting us. I decide to hit the bathroom to freshen up and fix my hair. I come back out to the lobby and I witness my friends walking out their cars (we had to take two to get everyone there). “No big deal,” one of them shouted back, “We have to get something, out of the cars. We’ll be right back.” I remember thinking how thoughtful they were—they must have gotten me some sort of present for my birthday.
Except, as I watched them head to the car through the windowed doors of the restaurant, I could see them laughing and they got IN the cars and LEFT!!!!
I did not know what to think. Honest to God. I ran out those doors so fast, into the cold and I start flailing my arms screaming “Hey! HEY!! Where are YOU Going? HEY!! Don’t leave me!!” I tried to chase them on foot but it was really slippery outside and they paid no attention whatsoever!!
They DITCHED ME!!
I don’t know if I was just really stunned or what? It was if the cat got my tongue. What kind of freaking stunt was that?? I had to have stood there for an eternity as I watched them pull out of the parking lot and speed away.
So, I walked back inside, to go find a pay phone. And there is the host all ready with menus in hand as he says, “Please follow me, your table is waiting.” I’m almost in tears. I hesitate. “Right this way,” he repeats as he motions for me to follow him. Fine. I followed him. A huge chocolate mudslide sounded pretty damn good right about then, what the hell!! He leads me back to a small type of banquet room behind two double doors. I follow him in as he opens the doors for me and then I stop stunned at what held my eyes.
I walked into a room with a small table set for two, with wine poured and candles (well those oil lamp candles) lit. And there was my boyfriend in his black leather boots and black suede cowboy hat with a private table in a private room and some country music piped in from somewhere. Man was he a site for my misty eyes. He had been in on the plan all along.
OOOOOH…they had got me good! I was totally played!! *smiles*
We met up with the my friends later for drinks…they had thoroughly enjoyed their little stunt. I had to admit…they had me pretty darn good. I vowed then and there to get them back—somehow, someway, someday, very soon.
And those are the two best stories I have to tell you about being Played and being the Player. I have to say—what goes around—really does come around!!